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As adults, we find ourselves faced with a myriad of duties each day, week, month or year. Teaching isn’t usually the highest of our priorities. When we think of teaching, we think of professionals, those teaching our children formally within the context of education. We don’t always see teaching as informal and constant. Everything we do or don’t do will affect someone around us and will teach others how to respond and react.
Have you ever found yourself at a fancy restaurant – a new experience – with silverware, multiple glasses and dishes of various shapes and sizes? Each piece of glassware or silverware intimidates us. What if we pick up the wrong piece? Where do I start? From the left or the right? We begin looking around to see what others are doing. Surely, they know what they are doing. We begin to imitate. At least we won’t be the only one doing what we are doing.
Families teach each other daily. Within the family of origin, many lessons are taught and demonstrated by others in the family. Lessons are not isolated to doing things around the house but about how one acts, responds, is aware of others and willingly assists others. The list can go on forever. In short, our families have taught us how to deal with life.
The one aspect of life which appears to fall through the cracks is the development of our children’s spirituality. The church has consistently offered programs to assist in the education of children and adults in the teachings of the Catholic Church. Once the adults or children have attained the desired goal of the Eucharist or confirmation, the educational process tends to dwindle. There is little or no follow-through on the part of adults nor reinforcement within the home for the children. As a result, it may take years for the children or newly confirmed young adults to fully integrate faith into their lives. The children do not have the ongoing modeling needed for them to live their lives from a faith-based perspective.
The Year of Family and Faith is a great time to renew our resolve to make faith the driving force behind our family and personal decisions, as well as behind how we act with each other and others outside the home.
When children witness their parents using their faith to make decisions, it is then that children see the importance of faith. Deciding as a family to pray together or go to church regularly without exception can and does become a powerful witness.
Adults making daily decisions based on the values of faith, right and wrong, and the teachings of Christ bring stability, continuity and order to the structure of the family. Instead of reaching for “what would Jesus do?” children would only have to ask: “What would Dad or Mom do?” Now, faith is real; it is woven into the fabric of their lives.
Are we any closer to answering the question – do I consider myself a teacher?
The answer is yes! We are all teachers by what we say and what we don’t say. We are teachers by what we do and by what we don’t do. It is up to each of us to follow Christ as perfectly as we are able. Our children are learning.
Deacon David Farinelli is coordinator of marriage preparation and enrichment for the archdiocesan Family Life Apostolate.
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