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We pray together as a family several times throughout the day. We say grace before meals, and we pray together on the way to school every morning. But, it is before our children go to bed each night that we spend the most time in prayer together as a family.
When our daughter was only a few months old, my husband and I found ourselves in a Catholic bookstore, and we stumbled across “My Bedtime Prayer,” by Jesuit Father Tony McCaffery. We had seen other children’s prayer books, but we both really liked this one.
When our daughter was just a few months old, the three of us would sit together saying the prayer as I nursed her to sleep. Over time, the prayer was memorized, and a few things were changed to better fit our family.
As the years passed, our family grew and our nighttime prayer grew, too. As a family of four, we began adding a prayer asking God to watch over each of us by name and the “baby in Mama’s tummy,” as we anxiously awaited the birth of our third and then fourth child.
At some point, I wanted our children to feel more included in our nightly prayer ritual, so after my husband finished our memorized nighttime prayer and I asked God to watch over each of us by name, we took turns thanking God for our favorite part of the day. This not only allowed us to take a moment to think about our day, but it also began teaching our children, at an early age, the importance of not just asking God for things in prayer, but also offering God prayers of thanksgiving.
Over time, this addition to our nightly prayer grew even more, and it is now an abbreviated, child-friendly version of St. Ignatius of Loyola’s Examen. We all think about our day and then take turns thanking God for our favorite parts of the day, naming what we did well.
Once they are in second grade, what can we do better? After each person is finished, another family member will offer a prayer. For example, our child friendly Examen looks something like this:
“Thank you, God. My favorite part of the day was recess. I did well doing my homework today. I can do better at listening to my parents.”
After this prayer, another family member offers a prayer.
“Thank you, God, for letting (name) enjoy recess and thank you for letting him do his homework well. Please let him do a better job of listening to Mama and Papa tomorrow.”
We continue this until everyone has had a turn. Just like school or work, meals and socializing with friends, prayer is also an essential part of our daily lives. By teaching and offering different prayer methods and tools at an early age, I hope that as our children grow up, they will always remember to make time in their day for prayer.
Charlotte Phillips lives in New Orleans with her husband Kevin and their four young children. Professionally, she is the ministry assistant and blog manager for Becky Eldredge. She has a bachelor’s degree in theology and a master’s degree in pastoral studies from Spring Hill College. Charlotte enjoys Ignatian Spirituality, reading, listening to live music and bike riding with her family.