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NOLACatholic Parenting Podcast
A natural progression of our weekly column in the Clarion Herald and blog
Last summer, Juliet Carrigee put on her pink dress and set off for the opera.
Nicknamed “Madame Butterfly” – for her love of Lepidoptera – Carrigee was bound for a theatrical production that could have been named in her honor: Puccini’s “Madame Butterfly.”
“I still think about that night a lot; I hope they bring another opera that I can go to,” said Carrigee, 89, of the evening, spent with her son in luxurious box seats at the Mahalia Jackson Theater for the Performing Arts.
For Carrigee, an 89-year-old resident of Our Lady of Wisdom Healthcare Center who uses a wheelchair, nights such as these entail a lot of planning and expense.
On “Madame Butterfly” night, however, every detail was covered, from the handicapped-accessible station wagon that chauffeured Carrigee to the theater, to the thrilling backstage invitation to meet the cast after the show.
Simple pleasures
“They gave me a dozen pink roses! I felt like a queen,” said Carrigee, whose experience was made possible by the New Orleans Opera Association through the “VIP Elder Wish Come True Program,” an Our Lady of Wisdom initiative that fulfills the hopes and dreams of residents by partnering with the local community.
The wishes of individual residents often are modest and affordable, with recent requests including an aromatherapy pillow to encourage better nighttime rest; a padded seatbelt strap to make car travel more comfortable; a birdfeeder to coax wildlife into Our Lady of Wisdom’s courtyard; and a fried shrimp platter for two.
“The request can be as simple as a bottle of candy,” said Rebecca Stahr, Our Lady of Wisdom’s director of mission advancement, who launched the wish program in January 2013.
Stahr gathers residents’ requests four times a year, lists them in a brochure and mails them to her database of about 500 individuals, businesses and institutions. The community responds by providing a requested service, purchasing a desired item or sending in a donation that can be earmarked for a specific wish or used as needed.
“It’s about connecting hearts,” said Stahr, adding that most residents of the 138-bed facility have a deep desire to spread their wings beyond their home at Our Lady of Wisdom, as warm and vibrant as it is. “(The wish program) brings the outside in, and that hope that our residents can cultivate outside relationships,” she said.
Other-centered wishes
Stahr said in many cases, residents’ wishes aren’t even for themselves.
In one poignant request, a resident asked if a fruit basket could be delivered to a local hospice – so individuals there could have “a treat in their last days of life.” Another resident wondered if an appreciation plaque could be made for her son, “who brings the most wonderful, caring love.”
Stahr said a recent personal highlight was when a resident chose to honor the life of her late husband by requesting funds for mentorship training at CASA Jefferson Parish, a nonprofit organization that advocates for abused and neglected children in the parish’s juvenile court system. When Mount Carmel Academy learned of the woman’s wish, the high school, whose students volunteer at CASA, donated the requested $100. When CASA’s executive director visited Our Lady of Wisdom to tell residents about the organization’s work, Stahr saw the woman who had made the initial request beaming with pride over her husband, a CASA volunteer during his lifetime.
“It was like a homecoming for her,” Stahr said.
Sisterly gratitude
Resident Corrine Authement felt a similar sense of selfless satisfaction when her wish to give her sisters “a day at the spa” was carried out last spring.
“They come visit me so often and bring me food, so I wanted to pay them back. We eat under the gazebo (at Our Lady of Wisdom), and everybody says it makes their day to see us laughing and talking,” said Authement, 77, who waves off inquiries about any wishes she might have for herself.
“I’ve been a lucky person – very fortunate all through my life,” Authement said. “I can’t think of anything I want.”
That’s amore
Stahr said there was one instance in which a resident’s request could not be literally satisfied: a man with a dream of visiting Venice, Italy, could not pursue his wish because of mobility issues.
“So we engaged the community to see how we could bring Venice to Our Lady of Wisdom,” said Stahr, recalling the staggering response: DiMartino’s Muffulettas ferried a complete Italian meal to Our Lady of Wisdom one Saturday afternoon and tenor Jesse Nolan, of the singing group Bon Operatit, entertained the diners.
“An entire unit of about 24 people got to have the Italian experience, not just the resident who asked for the wish,” said Stahr, who remembers spotting a diner lingering in this “virtual Venice” long after the tables had been cleared.
“I asked her, ‘Is everything OK?’ and she said, ‘Everything’s just perfect! I’m just relishing what I just experienced,’” Stahr said, adding, “You just can’t buy that with money.”
For information on the VIP Elder Wish Program, email Stahr at [email protected].
Beth Donze can be reached at [email protected].
Tags: Bob Laster, Elder Wish Come True, Our Lady of Wisdom, Rebecca Stahr, Uncategorized