Of our deepest connections, bond with God endures

    Howards End, a novel by E.M. Forster published in 1910, can be summed up with its famous epitaph: “Only connect.”
    In the novel, the protagonist, Margaret Schlegel and her sister Helen connect primarily with each other, but there is also a metaphysical connection that Margaret feels with a secondary character, Mrs. Wilcox. Indeed, their connection is so strong that, despite barely knowing Margaret, Mrs. Wilcox wills her Howards End, Mrs. Wilcox’s dearest possession – her home.
    As I was packing my things in my apartment and preparing to move into what will be my first place as a married woman, I was not only amazed by how many things I had collected in one year, but also how much I had connected with my first apartment.
    As I looked around at how empty my apartment was – empty bookshelves, empty desk, empty closets and cabinets – it struck me just how attached we can be to our homes. Looking at the desolation of an empty studio apartment, I realized that it was all of my belongings, my walking in and out of the door each day, that made my small apartment feel like home.
Father knows best
    I texted my dad before I began moving, telling him how sad it made me to see all of my belongings in boxes, ready to be carried away and placed elsewhere. He responded by telling me that we never forget our first place. I think that will prove to be true as I get older.
    Looking back, I remember the house in Chalmette where I grew up. I can still visualize my bright yellow room that I shared with my sister and the playroom that became my dad’s office. I remember the old pastel-colored floral wallpaper in the kitchen and the brick fireplace that became battle zones as my brother played with his toys. I remember moving to our current house in Slidell, but I don’t have as many memories of growing up there, primarily because we moved shortly before Hurricane Katrina and then my brother and I finished our senior year away from Louisiana before moving on to college.
    Our homes become almost the centerpieces of our lives. They are filled with so many memories that they seem to become alive. An empty shell of wood, plaster and brick forms a special connection with each of us, sharing certain aspects of our life’s journey and growing with us along the way.
House is full of memories
    It isn’t often that we reflect on how substantial a house can be to each of us; it’s not very often that we see certain aspects of our lives reflected in various parts of the house. Perhaps this is why so often we spend countless hours and expense on decorating and updating our homes. Perhaps this is why neighborhoods have the Parade of Homes – not just to show off the latest and greatest appliances and furniture that people have bought – but to emphasize that their house has become a home. It has become a place filled with memories and stories that are unique to each family.
    Yet it isn’t just the home that we develop connections with; we develop connections with various people in the course of our lives. We fill our homes with not just artwork, but photographs of people and places that we have connected with.
    As I was packing my frames and collages, I paused to look at all of the pictures that I’ve accumulated. Each frame holds a different phase of my life – pictures with my family from high school and throughout college, friends and places that I visited in college, and finally friends and trips that I’ve taken in graduate school.
    I’ve tried to capture as many memories as possible, and I realized that I tend to place them in the areas where I tend to work most. Glancing at the pictures of my family and friends when I’m stressed and upset or working on a paper or project that is close to its deadline helps me remember why I continue to do what I do. Remembering my support system gives me the strength and encouragement that I need to continue.
    Within the home and outside of the home, we are reminded of Forster’s epitaph: “Only connect.” Our faith bears witness to the connections between people and home as well – our church is our spiritual home and within our faith community are members of the body of Christ, connected not only to each other, but to God, the strongest connection of all. Within and without the home, families are meant to connect and be witnesses of our faith – that is our purpose as Catholics. Within the church, we too have memories, memories of a faith that has lasted for centuries and continues to guide and strengthen its faithful today. My dad’s words ring true even when compared with the church: we never forget our first place; even when we stray from our faith, we are always guided back in some form over time.
    As graduations come to a close and we begin to move into our own places in various stages of life, it is important to remember the material and spiritual connections that we have in our lives. When in times of doubt and frustration, it is always the strength of those connections and the memories held within them that will be able to guide us back in the right direction.
    Heather Bozant can be reached at hbozant@clarionherald.org.