First year of marriage results in many changes

    I’ve been a wife for 1 1/2 years and a mother for five months, and feel more complete than ever in these new-found roles. I recall being impatient and eager about finding “the one” and am very happy I trusted God’s timing, for when I was true to myself, love found me.
    My husband and I were briefly set up in college but life happened and nearly a decade later when our paths collided again we were wise enough to let God orchestrate our love. I doubted I’d ever meet the respectable, God-loving, handsome man of my dreams and then I bumped into my now husband, Roy.
    Our relationship evolved slowly as we grew closer and shared our passions and convictions for faith and family.  After dating a year, he got down on one knee during a surprise hot air balloon ride, promised to love me forever and asked me to marry him. We learned from the pilot that the balloon, “SkyBird,” was inspired by the book “Jonathan Livingston Seagull” and was meant to remind us of the depth of our God-given potential. The tale became a motto for us to live by.
    I remember a time during our engagement when we became emotional and shared concerns about our differences. I’ve always been a dreamer and have many creative ambitions, while he is more practical, and enjoys the comfort of stability. After talking, attending premarital classes and praying together we were reassured in our decision to love and support each other’s dreams. We saw eye to eye on the stuff that matters, such as keeping Catholic faith as the foundation of our marriage, welcoming children and loving each other through good times and bad.
    Our love reached even greater heights as we approached our wedding. I was taken aback by the wedding “industry” and had a few abrasive experiences. At times the business of planning put too much focus on everybody else, rather than us. When I was misunderstood and hurt, his love lifted my spirit and he helped me manage my expectations of others.
    Now married, edifying one another is so important. We rely on each other for accountability, strength and support. I am uplifted when he begins a prayer with me asking for God’s hand in our lives. Our unity has allowed me to be vulnerable and trusting in mind, body and spirit; something unachievable without the commitment and love found in marriage.   
    On our wedding day, as soon as the doors at St. Louis Cathedral opened and I saw Roy, a peace came over me. Our love and the blessing from God and our families was all that mattered. Our first dance as husband and wife was magical. The lyrics to “Promising Forever” perfectly expressed our feelings – “There is no one here to judge you, I only love you, feel free to close your eyes and fall. You can trust me, this is real, say exactly how you feel. Every breath of who you are tells a story that I love, I finally found the truth in what I see in you.”
    During the birth of our daughter, Lily, that song played as my mind drifted to images of our future together. Just the other day we danced to it in our living room while holding Lily. Whenever we hear it we are reminded of God’s promise to us manifested through our promise to each other.
    Simple moments of joy, such as playfully doing chores, welcoming each other home with a kiss, and watching each other tenderly care for Lily make me forever grateful for God-enriched love.  
      We’ve survived our first year of quarrels and experienced the constant need to communicate, forgive and appreciate each other. We’ve transitioned from best friends to lovers as spouses and now discover even more intimacy as mommy and daddy.
    Parenting has provided countless opportunities for patience, sacrifice and selflessness to prevail. As husband and wife we are a team. Knowing someone traveling down the same path as you is so comforting. While not easy or exciting all the time, I’ve found marriage and parenting to far exceed my expectations.            
    Lisanne Dussouy owns Bridal 911 and helps brides plan and prepare for marriage. She can be reached at [email protected].